Loneliness (Open)

[Terra]

All of Terra's days were starting to blend together. Every day the same things happened. She'd go to school, study, and kick some villain butt in the middle sometimes. Her feelings of guilt and regret were enough to put her in this permanent slump. Parts of her would probably never be the same, but at least she knew she'd never pull a side switch again. Terra kept wondering if it would have been better for her to keep pretending she didn't know who she was. That way, the Titans wouldn't have been able to convince her to live with them again. Things would have been better for the rest of the Titans that way. They wouldn't have to feel like their was a traitor among them every time they went to sleep. She knew she couldn't have them as friends if she did that though, and she'd mess them way too much.

Taking a sigh, Terra began to look up at the sky before realizing that the umbrella of the table she was sitting at was in the way of her view. Going to the Pizza Palace was her way of giving the Titans a break from their most-likely nervous feelings they probably get from being around her. Being alone bothered her, but Terra felt like she belonged alone for her crimes. Happiness wasn't fair for her. She felt all the happiness she used to feel had been demolished they day she turned to stone.

Terra took a bite out of her pizza as she let the loneliness continue to sink in.

OOC:
I apologize for this post. I realize that I am capable of posting something much, much, MUCH longer and in block quotes and all that, but I'm trying to keep it simple. I don't have a lot of time with my college classes, homework, and with constantly being at a place that doesn't have internet access. So yeah, sorry. Please don't hate. D:

[Mika Chu Ichimaru]

Mika parked her bright yellow scooter, right beside the door to the Pizza Palace. She looked around at the world through her goggles and had to smile slightly, she pulled her helmet off and ran her fingers through her pink hair trying to get it to look somewhat normal. With a sigh, as she realized her hair wasn't going to stay down, she sat her helmet on her seat and then pulled her goggles down so they hung loosely around her neck.

She went inside and ordered her pizza, just a single slice. She payed for it then walked outside to the eating area. She looked around, a few people here and there. She smiled and picked an empty table, her umbrella was closed and she looked around, the table beside her's was open, and a blonde haired girl sat there. She tried to decide if she knew the girl, but she wasn't sure. The blonde haired girl seemed to be deep in thought.

Mika stretched out on her seat and picked up her pizza, she pulled off a pepperoni and ate it as her eyes scanned the area. It was a strange feeling, being here alone, not exactly something Mika would call bad, just different. She always had someone with her, but not today. She took a bite of her pizza, the cheese stringy; she had to sit it back on the plate and use her fingers to break the cheese strings. After she swallowed she laughed at herself brightly.

[Terra]

Terra's feelings of loneliness and regret deepened the longer she sat there. She felt as if she would never be able to escape her own mind. As selfish as it would have been to stay with the rest of the Titans at the tower, she was wishing she could have to keep her mind off of the things that slowly teared her apart.

"That's it!" Terra exclaimed, slamming her fist down on the table lightly, but hard enough to make it jump. "I've gotta get my mind off of this!"

Suddenly, Terra remember she was in a public place. She quickly pulled back into herself and put her head down on the table. If people were going to stare, she minus well just give them the blond back of her head to remember. It was much better then the embarrassment of them seeing her face. Terra wished she would have just sucked it up and asked someone to go with her. It was have protected her from the humiliation.

[Mika Chu Ichimaru]

Mika jumped when the blond yelled. Mika looked at her, and watched as she sat her head down. She took another bite of her pizza as she debated what to do. 'Well she does seem upset.' She swallowed her bite and stood up, she carried her plate over the few steps to the blond's table. She put her usual sweet, friendly smile on as she stood beside the blond girl.

"Uhm, is this seat taken?" She asked sweetly smiling at the back of the girl's head. She waited patiently for a response, if the girl didn't want to have company, then she would leave. She had to try, it was a habit she had. She looked at the few other people who had started staring at the blond when she yelled. They were eyeballing the two suspiciously, but Mika wasn't exactly sure why.

She shook of their eyes, and brought her attention back to the blond, waiting for a response. Why was it that she always talked to people that probably liked being alone better? She wasn't sure, she was pretty sure it was something she had been taught when she was little, but she just thought of it as something she did now, something that made her Mika Chu.

[Terra]

The silence of the Pizza Palace was broken when Terra heard a voice that sounded like it was directed toward her. Not really wanted to show her face to all the people she'd just made herself look like a fool in front of, she lifted her head to look at the girl talking only enough to see her out of the corner of her eye. Sure enough, the voice was talking to her. Not wanted to be rude, Terra put effort into lifting her head up all the way until she was sitting up-right again.

"Ummmm," Terra said, not really knowing what she was going to say. "No, it isn't... You can sit there if you'd like..."

Terra wondered why she'd ask to sit with her when there was a few empty tables around the Pizza Palace. Maybe this girl was one of those mean girls looking to break Terra's spirit down. Either way, Terra was pretty snappy at the tongue herself in the field of trash talking when she needed it. She could hold her own. Still, her better judgment lead her to believe that this girl had innocent intentions and was most likely just a nice girl, like the Titans.

It felt wrong to Terra to let people be so nice to her after all she did wrong. Even the people that didn't know her were always so nice. She felt she didn't deserve it, but they also didn't deserve her being rude to them just so she could punish herself. She felt stuck, but there wasn't much she could do.

[Mika Chu Ichimaru]

Mika Chu, smiled and sat down across from the blond girl. She could tell that she had confused the girl, but that wasn't the first time she had done that to someone. She sat her plate in front of her and glanced around at the other people, most had gone back to their food. She brought her attention back to the blond.

”I'm Mika Chu Ichimaru,” She said brightly with a nod, ”What's your name?” She asked smiling. She picked up her pizza and took a small bite, as she waited for a response. She looked up trying to see the sky but then remembered that this umbrella was open. She looked back at the blond as she swallowed her bite.

((OOC: Hmm I can not think of a better post, I'm sorry :/))

[Terra]

When the girl gave her name, Terra couldn't help but like it. It was so pretty. Terra gave her a half smile and took a bite out of her pizza. Terra had a habit of eating like a boy. She didn't chew enough before she swallowed and ended up choking a little. After hitting her chest and coughing a bit, she was fine.

"I'm Terra, I'm a member of the..."

Terra stopped herself. She was about to mention that she was a Titan, but she really didn't think she had the right to be bragging about such a thing after the crimes she'd committed.

"I'm a member of the book committee for the high school," Terra finished her sentence with a lie.

Even though she felt she didn't deserve it, the girl's presence was actually starting to cheer her up a little bit. It sucked up a bit of the lonely feeling. Talking to someone else helped take her mind off of things.

"So, how old are you?"

Terra decided to keep up a conversation. By doing so, the girl was less likely to ask what was wrong with Terra. Terra really didn't want to have to explain her life story. That was the last thing she needed, another person knowing what a horrible person she was. Aside from the Titans, everyone else was denied access to the story. The less people to judge her, the better. It made it easier for her to gain the trust of others. She was already worrying about whether of not the Titans even trusted her all the way, especially Raven. Terra always felt like Raven was out to get her from the beginning. Of course, it was probably just all in her head anyways.

Looking at the girl again, Terra wondered if she'd even seen her around anywhere. If she had, the girl would probably already know she was a Titan. Well, she didn't treat her weirdly she she probably had no idea. On the other hand, the civilians of Jump City never seemed to give the Titans special treatment anyways. Either way, The girl didn't look familiar to Terra at all anyways.

As hard as she tried to keep herself focused on the situation in front of her, Terra couldn't help but wonder what the Titans were up to back at the tower. Did they even notice she was gone? Were they even at the tower? Maybe Beast Boy and Cyborg were absorbed in their video games. That'd mean they didn't notice for sure. Terra accepted the fact that life at Titan's Tower would always go on without her. She didn't belong their in the first place.

Terra snapped out of her train of thought instantly when a child dropped her pizza on the ground a few tables away and started crying almost instantly. She wondered if the girl had responded yet, and she was just to out of it to notice. Terra gave her a smile, just in case Mika thought she was being rude, which, she sort of was. Seeming rude was just another reason Terra needed to ditch the depression.

OOC:
Don't worry about it, just post what you can. I understand that I haven't been giving you much to post off of anyways, because I'm in a bit of a rush with my college classes and things. Your post was fine anyways. (:

[Mika Chu Ichimaru]

Mika chuckled softly, ”You ok?” She asked after the girl had choked slightly on her pizza. 'Book committee?' She wondered as she picked up her pizza and took a bite. Mika didn't know they had a book committee, but that wasn't too shocking, she didn't pay much attention to the groups at school, unless of course it was the art club. She swallowed her pizza and paused as she tried to register what the Terra had asked, 'Age?'

”I'm 16,” She said brightly, ”What about you?” She asked with a smile, as she glanced over at the crying child. Her smile faded, ”Aww, that's too bad,” she said shaking her head. She child had calmed down a little but still sniffled looking at it's pizza. Mika looked back at Terra with a smile, as she waited for a response. She took another bite of her pizza, as she began to drift into her own thoughts.

'She's avoiding why she's upset,' She thought, 'That's ok, she seems to feel a little better at least,' She decided as she swallowed her bite with a soft smile.

OOC: Oh you're doing fine I understand being rushed, and not having time to get good posts out but yours are good

[Terra]

Mika was only a year older then Terra, so that was good. It made Terra feel just a little uncomfortable being around people that were much older then her. Like, if she was eighteen, that'd be bad. They'd have nothing in common. She'd be ancient! Terra took another bite out of her pizza before answering.

"I'm fifteen," Terra said with a smile that wasn't entirely fake.

Terra wiped the pizza sauce off her face with her black sleeve. She was wondering what she should bring up now. She was willing to talk about anything as long as it meant she didn't have to talk about her problems. It would just bring her and the other girl down to talk depressing.

Looking over at the little kid again, Terra was relieved. He'd stopped crying, and he had another piece of pine apple pizza being shoved into his mouth. His mother most likely gave it to him. At least someone in this world was happy. She wished her problems could go away that quick. Wouldn't it be something if Terra could just die or get turned to stone again and wake up an entirely different person that even Beast Boy couldn't recognize? That would be the good stuff.

"Sooooo," Terra looked around nonchalantly, trying to come up with another subject to talk about. "What kinda pizza do ya like?"

Wow, really, what kind of pizza do you like? Terra had to seem like the most boring person in the entire world right now! She could at least tell her a funny story to keep her occupied, but no, Terra just had to come up with a very, very stupid question. She wanted to face-palm herself.

Terra glanced down at her communicating device between her and the rest of the Titans, and her smile disappeared. It hadn't even did so much as a beep since she'd gotten here. No one called. That must mean that no one cared she was gone without saying a word to any of them. She wasn't missed at all. Not even Beast Boy, whom she was clearly the closet to out of all the Titans, cared she was gone. This made her almost want to run away again for good. Terra couldn't understand why they all spent so much time trying to convince her to come back if they didn't even care about her anymore. Maybe they were just using her for her powers. Whatever it was they were using her for, Terra felt she deserved it. She didn't deserve real friends anyways. She was just a traitor as far as anyone seemed concerned.

Terra looked back at Mika. She was just a normal girl with a normal life. If Beast Boy had never seen her, she wondered if she could have kept up being a normal girl herself. She had already made friends at the school she went to when she was pretending to be normal, and they had her back. They didn't know anything about her, and it was better that way. Of course, now that The Titans knew she wasn't stone anymore, it'd be impossible to go back to that normal life again. She had no choice but to face her past now.